NICKOTEENN

I only have the one class to deal with, but just getting to and from it feels like an ordeal. The walk back up to my dorm includes a gnarly fucking hill and it takes the wind out of me every single time. Annoying!

Since you can’t smoke weed on campus property anyway, I end up taking a walk to get high. It’s cold, it’s quiet, and I can listen to music and zone out. It's sorta nice, actually. And once I get back into my room, I crack open a vodka cooler, sit back at my desk, and just let the fog set in.

It’s not like I’m out here partying hardy. It’s mostly just me, slightly buzzed, staring at my monitor. Roblox has been my main go-to lately. First time I've gotten back to it since I was a young lad. It isn't bad, really. But it gets strangely repetitive.

I guess it’s a boring way to spend my time, but right now, it’s the only part of the day I actually look forward to. Life’s just stuck on repeat, and for tonight at least, I’m fine with doing absolutely nothing of value.

It feels like this trip was meant to be life-changing, and judging by what everyone else was saying at the end, it was. For them. But now I'm home, sitting at my dorm desk, vaping, considering. And all I can really think about is that I have class tomorrow, and that life is about to slip right back into normal like nothing happened.

Maybe I didn't let myself get into it enough. Maybe it just wasn't my kind of trip. Either way, I'm unmoved. Still, I'm glad I went. The hotels were nice, I ate a lot of free food, and I saw some genuinely great things, even if none of them led to any epiphany.